2007-07-24 - 11:14 p.m.

ugh. so livejournal is in icu, it would appear, and i'm stuck with no choice but to attempt updating here, though i've come to somewhat loathe this site (but not the people who still call it home).

yesterday was very busy and grumpified. being woken up by skunk smell at 5am really didn't help. i'm just getting really tired of all this stress. there's just so much going on and my brain is shutting down. i need a break so i'm taking one. i'm not doing anything related to organizing the house - unless, of course, not doing it causes me more stress.

over the past couple of days i've gone back to the old house and dug up most of my lilies. they seem to be doing well now that they've been transplanted here. the blooming ones are still blooming and nothing is drooping.

success!

we've still got a fair pile of stuff at the old house. mostly stuff from the kitchen, and then all our pictures on the walls. i'm still baffled at all the stuff we had in the kitchen.

there's not much left now and that's relieving.

i've done some writing over the last couple of days too. it feels good to be doing things for me and not worrying too much about the house.

today i wrote and then went shopping. i bought a small area rug for beside my bed (no more cold morning feet!) and then bought hp7 for $28 at wallmart. yes, i actually bought deathly hallows.

i read the spoilers online (wikipedia) and i rather like how she got out of things. i'm not too keen on the epilogue, but maybe it will be better when i actually read it in context. i won't say anymore about that just yet since a few of my readers aren't done the book yet. no spoilers here!

but i think jk handled things well enough and my desire to read the last 2 books has been rekindled after book 5 completely killed it. so i now have all 7 books. and i think it's amusing that boogawan was right about harry and horcruxes. heh. it makes sense though.

yesterday i went to the gym for the first time since i hurt my back. it's been over a month! but i did okay and wasn't too sore afterward, which is good. that means they'll discharge me from physio. sweet!

with the gym, all the gardening and all the packing, cleaning, and moving things my back is still doing all right. i'm SO glad it's back to normal.

and according to the scale at the gym i'm still losing weight. woot! i'm down to 235 now. so i've lost 9lbs since i began my weight loss crusade almost a year ago.

i think i would have liked to have lost 10 times that, but i'll take 9 for now.

hopefully life will settle down enough soon that we can get back into walking on a regular basis. i really need to lose a lot more. if i could get rid of another 10 or 20 by giftmas that would be fantastic!

seriously, this is a need thing. people always say "oh you look fine don't worry about it". first of all, i think saying i look fine is a bit insincere, because i look terrible.

i'm not saying all women deemed "fat" by society's ridiculous standards are ugly, but once your rolls get to a certain size, there's just no real beauty left there.

even when i was 200-220 i could still dress right and looked pretty good. i'd like to get down to 200 again and have curves instead of rolls. i think i could be sexy again.

but even appearances aside, i need to lose weight. i don't typically care how i look, though i'm starting to get a bit self-conscious about it now. i think i'm more concerned about my health. i don't have much energy anymore. my joints hurt. i just feel gross in general.

anyway, it's getting to be bedtime.

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